The House of my Mother Book Review | Shari Franke Memoir
In today’s blog post, we’re going to be discussing The House of My Mother by Shari Franke. This memoir was released on January 7, 2025 and depicts Shari’s life growing up with her well known Youtuber mother, Ruby Franke. Make sure you read until the bottom for my full The House of My Mother book review.
This book is heartbreaking, but it’s also empowering because Shari and her siblings are finally free. They are no longer controlled by their abusive mother. They get to live their lives on their own terms.
I can’t imagine how freeing that must feel. This was such an eye opening book and gave so much insight into the world of Youtube and how money can cause people to forget about their families and what is really important.
If you enjoyed today’s book discussion, you can read more of my memoir reviews here.
What is The House of My Mother by Shari Franke About?
From eldest daughter Shari Franke, the shocking true story behind the viral 8 Passengers family vlog and the hidden abuse she suffered at the hands of her mother, and how, in the face of unimaginable pain, she found freedom and healing.
Shari Franke’s childhood was a constant battle for survival. Her mother, Ruby Franke, enforced a severe moral code while maintaining a façade of a picture-perfect family for their wildly popular YouTube channel 8 Passengers, which documented the day-to-day life of raising six children for a staggering 2.5 million subscribers. But a darker truth lurked beneath the surface—Ruby’s wholesome online persona masked a more tyrannical parenting style than anyone could have imagined.
As the family’s YouTube notoriety grew, so too did Ruby’s delusions of righteousness. Fueled by the sadistic influence of relationship coach Jodi Hildebrandt, together they implemented an inhumane and merciless disciplinary regime.
Ruby and Jodi were arrested in Utah in 2023 on multiple charges of aggravated child abuse. On that fateful day, Shari shared a photo online of a police car outside their home. Her caption had one word: “Finally.”
For the first time, Shari will reveal the disturbing truth behind 8 Passengers and her family’s devastating involvement with Jodi Hildebrandt’s cultish life coaching program, “ConneXions.” No stone is left unturned as Shari exposes the perils of influencer culture and shares for the first time her battle for truth and survival in the face of her mother’s cruelty. (from Amazon.com)
My Initial Thoughts
I am very interested in Internet Culture. It all started in 2020 when I was sheltering in place at home. I was working remotely and needed something to listen to while I worked, because it was just me and Hazel (my dog) at home. I started listening to social commentary channels on Youtube and got hooked.
But I quickly realized that the contemporary issues being discussed online had different levels. One day a channel might be discussing something small and the next day they might be discussing a crime. And that’s how I first learned about 8 Passengers and Ruby Franke.
I remember being shocked by some of the stories I would hear about 8 Passengers. Like how Ruby was wouldn’t drop off lunch for her youngest child after she forgot hers at home. Or how one of her children had their bedroom taken away. It was weird, but it felt like little things.
But that’s the thing about little things. Separately, they are just little things. But when you add them all up they begin to tell a story.
A Few Things I Took Away From This Book
- It made me incredibly sad that Shari does not consider Ruby and Kevin to be her parents any longer. Or at least, she doesn’t refer to them as her Mom and Dad. They are on a first name basis.
- Shari is incredibly brave for sharing her story. I hope that revealing the truth about her childhood and her parents will help to set her free. She deserves closure for everything she went through and I hope that going forward she gets to live the private, social media free life she’s always wanted.
- I do have a lot of questions about the Mormon religion. Shari appears to still be practicing, but she also appears to be more open minded and considerate than her Mother and Jodi. I do have to wonder how much of Ruby’s Mormon upbringing had to do with the way she turned out. It’s not really any of my business, but I wonder if Shari connects any of her Mother’s behavior to how she was brought up and what ideas were instilled in her from when she was a young girl.
The Audiobook is Very Powerful
I chose the audiobook to be my Book of the Month book for this month. Listening to Shari read her own book was very powerful. It reminded me of what a strong young woman she is, to be able to read through some of the horrors in this story.
This Book is Very Well Crafted
I thought this book was written and crafted beautifully. I assumed that the title was in reference to the fact that Shari literally lived in her mother’s house, up until she was no longer welcome. But it’s actually in reference to a bible verse. The chapters all have thoughtful names as well and each chapter flows into the next and Shari continues on about her story of mental and physical abuse.
My Hopes for The Frankes
This was such a sad story to read, but it does have a happy ending. If you were unaware, Ruby Franke and Jodi Hildebrandt are each in jail for the horrible things they did to Ruby’s children.
I hope the Franke children are being taken care of and are each given the chance they deserve to start a new life. My heart broke so many times while listening to Shari’s story, but especially when she was separate from her family and had no idea what was happening to the kids. She did so many things to try to take care of her younger siblings, even when no one knew it. She didn’t give up because she knew that something was wrong.
And unfortunately, it was. They were treated poorly for such a long time and I hope that they all have the opportunity to go to therapy to process their trauma.
In Conclusion
Shari Franke’s memoir is difficult to read, but I also feel that it’s an important story for my generation (and others) to read. Because we may not relate to them in a religious sense, but we all have social media. It’s so temping to overshare. I don’t have children, but back when I had instagram I sometimes found myself typing out captions for photos that didn’t necessarily need to be posted online. It’s so easy to get sucked into the trap of oversharing.
But privacy is important for the well being of your child, and also you. Children should have choices. No child should be filmed without their consent or treated like a paid actor in their everyday life. That’s so wild.
I hope you enjoyed today’s The House of My Mother book review. It’s a difficult topic to talk about, but it’s also absolutely necessary. I’m so glad Shari Franke got the chance to share her story in such a profound way. I hope others can learn and grow from it.
